When I Worry About My Kids
I left my two daughters at their school this morning, and as I walked away, I thought of all the things that influence them. The things I can't really shift in their hearts right now. The things I'm concerned about. I thought about how my one daughter really cares right now about what her friends think, what her friends say, what her friends do. Everyone in her grade seems to be wrapped up in who likes who, who chases who in tag on the playground, and I can see her little heart being enticed by the drama of that world of complex and shifting playground emotional attachments. It's childlike now, but it speaks to what wants to control and influence her heart for the future, as well.
My other daughter isn't quite sure where she's safe. She wonders if she can be safe in a class without her parents around, where adults sometimes have rules that might not always be explicit, and peers don't always treat each other, or her, with kindness. She wonders if she can be safe when she feels many deep emotions, but doesn't know how to communicate them.
As I walked away, I thought about how, as a mom, I have options for what to do with what I notice. I can choose to, and HAVE chosen to, worry about my girls primarily. I could ignore what they're experiencing. I could try to make it all better, to take their struggles away.
OR I could choose to believe that, because I am beloved of God, because my children are seen and cared for by their Maker, everything they go through in their life is known by God and is used by the Sovereign King to do His healing and growing work in their lives. They are not alone, having bad things happen to them. They are not subject to random circumstances. They are held by a God whose rule and reign is absolute, even in details like caring about friends opinions in second grade, and safety in kindergarten.
So what can I choose to do practically? I can choose to pray. I can take my thoughts and my concerns and my noticings to the Lord. I can tell them to Him. I can remember His care. I can ask Him if there are things He wants me to do.
As I walked away, I thought of this song. It helped me as I shifted my perspective to remember that I, and my girls, have a Maker.